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Thoughts and tips to help a family
I was just asked for my advice from a family that is wanting to adopt a 10 week old corgi. I am happy they are looking to adopt – that is a good thing, but the situation is what has me concerned
Some info.
– they never owned a corgi. Working with them in daycare , I know they need a job and have high herding energy
– they have 4 kids all under the age of 10. The youngest is almost 2 – corgis are know to nip more (herding) and with the busy lifestyle will they have time to meet this dogs needs
– they have a 3 year old male pointer. He is great with the family but does have prey drive with squirrels, rabbits and birds. What will he think of this corgi?
They were my red flags I brought up in conversation. They said they completely understand and are aware. I explained it will be a super slow introduction and also never leave the dog unsupervised with the children. I know they fell in love with the picture and say the daughter always wanted one. But I can’t say my trainer radar is going off. What are all your thoughts? Do you have any advice of anything else I should discuss with them?
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15 Replies
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@pawsup , I think your concerns are valid and am very glad you were able to address them with the family. Sadly, people are not always eager to take good advice, and the best you can do is be there to provide continuing support as a trainer, which they’re surely going to need!
In the meantime, if you happen to find any helpful articles you can share on the topic, that would be a nice, low-pressure way to feed them supportive info in bite-sized doses and keep your name front of mind.
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@virginiad Thank you! Such a great idea about articles, I was actually on a rescue website just before I read this and they wrote a good article about the concerns I had. I am going to keep looking up more. I appreciate you agreeing with my concerns. Sometimes it’s hard for me to tell people what I think because I worry I am hurting their feelings.
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It sure can be tricky — the communication piece. But I think we do it from a place of compassion and with the genuine desire to help, people can feel that. But if we get stuck on ‘knowing what’s best’ and prioritize our ‘being right, so please listen to me now!’ we may not remain open to those windows of opportunity when we can help.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched clients insist on following their chosen path only to rue it afterwards. I want to be nonjudgmental enough that they seek my help whenever they are ready to listen. ????
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Thank you! Such great advice!
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@pawsup I think you are the most compassionate person they could contact! I’m glad they reached out to you! It is so hard when the person isn’t really looking for advice as much as they want a trainer to just agree with them. I think you are spot on.
Hoping you can find some window in the conversation to encourage them to look at the big picture for their young children’s sake. It is not fun to be herded, or nipped at.
Good luck, Krista, I know you are an amazing person! They are lucky to have you.
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Hi Krista,
All is not lost if the parents are on board to be thoughtful about the puppy’s needs. The fact they reached out is a very, very good sign.
You know all the things to recommend, so far as safe set ups and cautions.
Remember to fold in some “easy wins” too. The kids can play certain games with the new puppy, like laying a treat trail and practicing recall round robin games with the parents participating too. The puppy can be taught to carry a toy, and to choose her toy from a pile of kids stuff (spread out at first to make the right choice easy.
The pointer should never have access to the puppy without an adult present, of course, and even then, keeping him leashed is a smart choice to prevent him overwhelming the pup. In time they’ll likely be great friends as those two breeds have similar playstyles. Scatter feeding, laying scent tracks with game scent and a food drop and taking turns retrieving (one dog is held by the collar while the other dog goes, then switch) can all lead to mutually beneficial relationships.
By giving the family some easy wins, you can guide them along a path to a wonderful relationship for all.
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@bernerlabreclectus @catherine Thank you guys for such great advice! I am writing some things up now. I love the easy win ideas! So valuable for the kids. I do agree that they will have similar play styles. My corgis in daycare could always keep up with the big dogs and also correct when needed. I did have a great conversation today and with what I shared already, they talked to the adoption place and are basically fostering the puppy and if all goes well will adopt, but at least the puppy will have a place to go if its overwhelming tot the family. I think this is great that they are looking at all options of what may be. I believe they are going today to start the process.
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This is an inexpensive book and easy to read for families with kids and dogs. It’s so easy to read. They can read it to the kids and it has great pictures for illustration and I’ve recommended it to several of my clients.. Just a suggestion
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Thank you! I will be getting this book. Always open to new ones!!!
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@Denise great book recommendation -that one is chock full of great ideas.
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Thank you both for sharing these great ideas and book. I will be checking that book out and making a C list of these kids-friendly puppy ideas, myself.????
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Update on case: Puppy came home and they tried to slowly introduce the pointer- but it just was not working. I was not there for this, and they took the pup back to rescue. The pup was adopted next day by another family. So everyone learned something and the puppy still got a great home!
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Sometimes, that’s the best answer for everyone. I’m glad the people were able to see that early, before any real harm could be done. It’s good they had you along for the journey; I’m sure you helped them. Remember to offer “selection services” if they consider adding to their family. You may be able to help them find a match!
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Yes @catherine i agree! I sent them that website you gave me to look for good breeders. They want a pointer again, they they are slowly looking:)
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@pawsup that’s great news – I hope they are smart and ask you for help with puppy selection!
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