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We need more empathy in dog training
Hi all, I’ve been working with a local rescue and their foster parents. With one of the dogs, I recommended we fit and condition the use of a muzzle because this dog has multiple bites on record. I also accompanied the foster parent and dog to lessons with my +R reactive dog trainer. She went through the classes& I was told all was going well. I recenty found out the dog was let out on 2 more occasions without her muzzle. She attacked people on both occasions, unfortunately, one of them needed several stitches on both legs.
I said I recommend more classes w my trainer, they wanted someone else.
I went by to see the dog yesterday. I heard she was doing really well. When I got there, I waited in my car until she had a muzzle on her. I was greeted nicely but noticed she was wearing a prong. Again, the fosters reiterated that she’s doing SO much better. I looked at her neck and realized how tight the prong was on her neck. She had a rash along her neck in the Karla area due to the collars rubbing against each other. Again I asked about why she was wearing a prong? I sugared up their response when they said that is the only way to control her. I advised that they should take the pricing off or at least please make sure they loosen it because it is digging into the dogs neck. My question is, how do you fix this behavior, if you’re not consistently giving the dog the same message. Besides that I strongly believe that pot prongs cause more damage, physical or mental to a dog, then just taking the steps to modify a behavior.
Unfortunately, this is a very small rescue with very few fosters and a dog that will not be easy to place with a new foster or future home.
Feeling very disheartened since I came to volunteer at this rescue with the notion that no aversive methods or training tools would be used. I don’t want to be mistaken as someone who supports the use of these.
To make matters more complicated, the foster mom and one of the ladies running the rescue already have had differences of opinion over many other things & no longer talk to each other.
I hate to see this pup in a prong.
Sorry for the long post.
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4 Replies
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@lis – sending you a big warm mug of tea ????or glass of wine ????and a hug right now. This stuff is so very hard. I’m so sorry you are caught in the middle, not to mention the poor dog and the confused foster.
As hard as all of this is, it’s real life.
????People are often doing the best they can, with the knowledge they have at the time. This may not align with our plan, our beliefs or our priorities and it really hurts to stand by and feel powerless about it.
There may not be anything you can do to expressly help this dog.???? His behavior sounds extreme and he should likely be in the care of an advanced behavior consultant or vet. behaviorist. That is probably not within the reach for the rescue, nor does it sound that they’ve reached the point in their learning journey where such lessons will be received. Again, I wish I had better news.
Changing people’s minds… it can only be done when the people are ready to change.????♀️ Sometimes that means we remain available, asking good questions that nudge them toward different ways of thinking (rather than telling them they are wrong) and finding a middle path. It is hard. If you choose that road, please make a plan to sustain yourself with self-care for the long road. ???? Burnout is real.
Since you expressed a difference of philosophy from where this rescue is going, it may be a good time to ask yourself the following: ❓
- What kind of work do I want to do?
- What sort of people do I want to work with?
- Where can my talents and skills best be used?
- How can I take care of myself, best, in order to continue having a positive impact for the long haul?
????By getting clear about your mission, your passions, your direction, you can set yourself on a path to do the most good, where your skills will be valued.
Thank you for bringing this case and your vulnerability here. We are a safe place to work through some of this stuff together. I hope others will join in and share their experiences and wisdom.
Please go enjoy that tea or wine! ????
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I can feel your whole heart in this post. It is extremely hard to try to guide someone in the right direction and they do what they want anyways. I still have to repeat to myself many times like @catherine said people only know what they know. I just had a bite case and referred them off to a vet behaviorist, and even though they didn’t believe me the vet could help they still made an appt. for an evaluation. So i hope this dog has a fighting chance. I also started working with a puppy one time and they knew what I believed in- my first session they started with a shock collar for electric fence. I went over things and said if I cant show you we can make a great recall without it, you can go back to what you think is easier. The puppy is 7 months old now and they never used the collar once:) When I read your post I see myself, you are doing an amazing job presenting who you are and your beliefs but people are not following things and it hurts to watch that. Maybe ask yourself the questions Catherine wrote and maybe look into another rescue. Any rescue would be lucky to have you! I just turned down a job because they didn’t respect my boundaries two days ago, it was super hard but I know what I believe in is so important!
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Kudos to you, @pawsup , for setting boundaries. That can be so hard to do.
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@virginiad thank you-
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